Essential Relationship Skills, Mindsets and Behaviors: Being a Healthy Partner

by | Jun 17, 2023 | 2 Healthy Individuals, Clean and Curious Communication, Healthy Relationship Behaviors, Healthy Relationship Mindsets | 0 comments

Essential Relationship Behaviors and Mindsets for Being a Healthy Partner

Having a relationship is a truly wonderful experience, but it can be challenging in today’s fast-paced stressful world. Maintaining a fulfilling and healthy connection requires the right mindset, relationship behaviors, and self awareness. Having a healthy, happy, and harmonious relationship is possible by being a healthy partner.

Whether you’re starting a new relationship or have been committed for years, understanding the key elements of a successful partnership is essential for being a healthy partner. This article explores essential behaviors and mindsets that can enrich your relationship and empower you to become a skilled and nurturing partner.

Being a healthy partner takes a healthy dose of self-awareness…

And commitment to learning and building these relationship skills, behaviors, and mindsets:

  • Respect for yourself and your partner 
  • Loving your partner, and yourself, while also allowing yourself to be loved
  • Balancing your individuality with being a couple
  • Valuing and appreciating each other 
  • Being supportive of yourself and your partner
  • Embracing trust and following through on commitments
  • Having and providing emotional, spiritual, financial, physical, and mental safety
  • Creating space to feel accepted, heard, and understood
  • Listening with curiosity and the sole goal of understanding each other
  • Creating common ground when differences emerge
  • Creating intimate connection with each other through communication, support, and empathy
  • Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries with each other, especially with emotional, spiritual, financial, physical, and mental safety
  • Making time for romance, intimacy, and sex

To develop and grow these essential relationship behaviors, mindsets, and skills, there are seven key things you must begin with and sustain throughout your relationship.

Clean, Curious, and Open Communication: Being a Healthy Partner

At the foundation of every thriving relationship is effective communication.  Effective communication means being able to share your perspective without fear of retribution or arguments. 

This means being able to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a way that’s honest to the core of your being, while also being respectful and supportive. It also means being able to listen with 100% focus to your partner to hear what they’re saying without interpretation, assumption, or imposing your feelings about it.

When you practice clean, curious, and open communication skills, you will reduce misunderstandings and create a more intimate and fulfilling relationship.

Clean communication – being completely transparent and owning your feelings, opinions, behaviors, strengths and weaknesses without imposing them on your partner or your relationship. 

Curious communication – being curious about what your partner is sharing with you, seeking to learn more about them, and being fully focused and present as they communicate with you.  Giving the gift of curious communication, you listen with complete presence and focus which provides your partner with immense love, support, empathy, and appreciation all of which helps them become a better person and partner.

Open communication – feeling utterly and completely safe such that you can share absolutely anything with your partner and know that you are loved, supported, and championed.

Healthy communication supports being a healthy partner as an individual and as part of a couple with a balance of:

  • It’s all about me vs it’s all about us
  • Having personal core values and life priorities vs combined/relationship core values and priorities
  • Building safety and security in all aspects of your relationship
  • Being heard and understood through the practice of clean and curious communication
  • What being a couple vs an individual in a relationship means to each of you with specific ways to balance each

Trust and honesty

Trust and honesty are two essential pillars of a healthy relationship. When you’re honest with your partner, you’re building a foundation of trust, which is essential for any successful partnership.

Trust means believing in your partner’s reliability, respecting their belongings and personal space, and knowing they will always tell you the truth. Honesty also means being truthful with yourself and acknowledging when you’ve made a mistake or done something wrong. When both partners practice trust and honesty, it strengthens the foundation of the relationship.

Emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, understand and manage your own emotions, while also managing your energy and not reacting to the emotions of others… instead being supportive and facilitating the exploration of their emotions without getting flustered.

When you’re emotionally intelligent, it helps to create a more harmonious and successful relationship while being a healthy partner. It means being aware of your partner’s emotional state and being able to empathize with them. It also means being able to regulate your own emotions when conflicts arise, and not allowing them to get out of control. Emotional intelligence is a powerful tool in any relationship and can help to create a more positive and fulfilling dynamic.

Empathy and understanding in healthy relationships

Empathy and understanding are two essential components of any successful partnership. Empathy means being able to put yourself in your partner’s shoes, actually being able to imagine, think and feel what they are experiencing, and genuinely understand their feelings. It also means being able to acknowledge when you’ve made a mistake and taking steps to make things right. Understanding means being able to look at the situation from both sides and seeing things from your partner’s perspective. When both empathy and understanding are present in a relationship, it creates a more intimate and loving partnership.

Conflict resolution skills 

Conflict and managing differences are a natural part of any relationship with ebbs and flows throughout the relationship. However, it’s how you handle the conflict that can make or break the relationship. When you’re able to resolve conflicts in a healthy and constructive way, it helps to create a stronger and more fulfilling relationship. This means being able to express your feelings and needs in a respectful way, and being able to listen to your partner’s perspective. It also means being willing to pay more attention to common ground and cocreating a solution from common ground rather than intense focus on the differences between you or on what you gain or lose.  You have a higher change of finding resolution that works for both partners.

Self-care and personal growth in relationships

When you’re in a committed relationship, it’s essential to take care of yourself as an individual. This means pursuing interests and hobbies that make you happy and fulfilled. It also means taking care of your physical and emotional well-being, so you’re always at your best. Personal growth is also an essential component of any successful partnership. When both partners are constantly growing and learning, it helps to create a more fulfilling and satisfying relationship.

Building a strong foundation for a healthy partnership

At the core of being a healthy partner is building a strong foundation for your relationship. This means taking the time to understand your partner’s needs and desires, and being willing to work together to achieve them. It also means being willing to be vulnerable and open when you’re communicating with your partner. When both partners commit to building a strong foundation, it makes it easier to weather any storms or challenges that come your way.

In conclusion, mastering the art of being a healthy partner is possible with the right behaviors and mindsets. By prioritizing effective communication, honesty, trust, emotional intelligence, empathy, understanding, conflict resolution, self-care, personal growth, and building a strong foundation for your relationship, you can create a relationship that thrives and brings you both happiness and fulfillment. While it’s not always easy, the rewards of a healthy partnership are immeasurable.

Keep these essential behaviors and mindsets in mind and take steps to incorporate them into your relationship today.  Start by taking The Relationship Languages Quiz to give you a jump ahead in building relationship skills that will help you build a stronger, healther relationship.

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Dr. Dar Hawks. Relationship Coach for Couples

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Hi, I’m Dr. Dar…

If I could share just one thing with you today, let it be this: you have the power to shape your relationship into what you want it to be.

I am Dar, the Relationship Healer. I help couples to solve the communication and relationship issues that could potentially tear them apart. 

Until I started on the coaching path that led to my formulation of the Relationship Languages, most of the problems in my life had been due to problematic relationships… relationships where I felt unable to communicate, where I was not being heard, where I was not feeling understood. 

I have learned that, to create happy, healthy, and harmonious relationships even when you have differences, you have to learn how to give and receive communication in a healthy way. You have to feel safe expressing how you feel and what you need. 

That’s the beauty of the Relationship Languages. Once understood, they are the key to safe, curious communication. 

I’m here to help you on your journey to understanding and being understood. 

From my heart to yours,

Dr. Dar - The Relationship Healer - The 5 Relationship Languages Quiz
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